classy and fabulous

i shall send you to heaven, before i send you to HELL.

exoticquixotic:

nfloffseason:

“Tom, my NFL consigliere, what brings you here today?”

“Forgive me Father, but I have a delicate issue to discuss with you. This QB in Denver. I think it’s time I taught him a lesson and sent him home for the offseason. I thought I did it once, but he has returned. This time in my own home. This is unforgivable to me.”

“You are right. You dealt with him once, spared him his NFL life, & now he returns, seeking revenge? It is time for this QB to be taught a lesson. Go out this week & silence him once & for all.”

“Thank you, Father. I knew you’d understand.”

“Of course and remember: Leave the gun, but take the cannoli.”

ahahahahaha…I don’t even like the Patriots but you better believe I’ll cheer for them tomorrow.

Reblogged 1 month ago from exoticquixotic

66 notes
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  Sorry Tim, everyone knows God
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  Tom vs. Tim, who’s gonna win? (hint - not...douche.) (the douche being Tim.) (because
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31. exoticquixotic reblogged this from nfloffseason and added:
  
  ahahahahaha…I don’t even like...you better believe I’ll cheer
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  Omg…that was good.
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